Awareness is KEY
Ever wonder how Sherlock Holmes became one of the world’s most famous (Fictional) Detective? Yup, by watching people. Creepy, isn’t it?
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Written by Benjamin Ngiam
Chances are, you have been socializing around for what… Your whole life?
Have you ever stopped to observe and notice how people behave around you?
How they carry and present themselves to everyone?
What about their response towards your behavior?
Whenever you do something, would their reactions be positive or negative?
You’ve probably never actually been conscious nor aware about this being of any importance and hence, you’ve never cared that much about the behavior of others.
I mean, so what if I tell my buddy he looks stupid when he got all dressed up for a date and he got all upset over it?
Sure, he is upset at me for now but we’ll be back sharing stupid stories and ripping on each other’s flaws again after a few days like nothing bad had actually happened.
Not exactly a bad thing since things may still go back to normal BUT, what if I tell you, that if you start observing people and analyze their behavior before you do or say anything, you might actually GAIN something from it?
Let me elaborate…
When you start to observe people, you start to take note and become aware of how they behave. This gives you an idea on what they are like, what kind of personality traits they possess and what kind of behavior they may exhibit.
The way they stand, walk, talk, how they look at the people around them, as well as how they hold their facial expressions.
Yes, even the way they smile is critical here.
Another interesting fact, did you know that the way a person blinks (Speed, pattern, etc) can convey specific message as well?
Yes you do, you just didn’t realize it till I brought it up here. A typical yet, elusive example? A wink. 😉
Let’s become one of the X-Men… Or Spiderman
When you start to become aware of people’s behavior around you, you can start to PREDICT what they are like and what they MIGHT do, which gives you the ability and edge to adjust your behavior and react accordingly before things happen. It also gives you some time to plan things in advance.
This may prevent mishaps or any other negative consequences from happening and sometimes, even create a good positive outcome.
You see your friend from afar and you plan to go greet him with you guys’ usual “Hi-Five” (Or a headbutt if that’s you guys’ thing) BUT, you notice that he is with his girlfriend, whom, you’re not close to.
Now, it is clear that they are having a conversation.
What would happen if you just went in and headbutt greet your buddy without first, assessing the situation and observing the couple’s behavior?
First, you would be perceived as rude for interrupting and invading into people’s conversation.
How would you like it if someone just jump in and interrupt you while you’re in the middle of sharing a story of how your dog amazingly managed to get its paws on your pie that was left on top of the refrigerator to someone?
Second, if the couple’s mood were actually sore (Maybe they just had a fight), you butting in like this may actually cause a rise in tension as the girlfriend may feel neglected by her boyfriend and wants him to give her his attention when they are in an argument.
Yet, you just came in and swooped all that from her…
Obviously, she is NOT ONLY going to resent you for that, she is also going to want to strangle the life out of her boyfriend for actually allowing you to do that. Not exactly something you’d want to be responsible for as a good friend…
If you actually assessed the situation, analyzed and determined that it is not alright for you to go in and say “Hi”?
You would be able to save some issues from rising and give yourself the chance to still being able to set a good first impression as a good friend to your friend’s girlfriend in future meeting and not be perceived as a total jackass.
So, the above are just some of the benefits of having your “Awareness Radar” switched on and I’m sure you can think of other benefits for it since you are now aware of it as well.
Basically, just by being AWARE, you can prevent negative consequences and possibly create a good outcome if you actually take your time to observe the people around you.
In other words, it pays to actually be aware of behavior (Of both others, and your own).
Besides, when you PREDICT a behavior and actually get it right, you get to experience what it’s like to be a mind-reader… Or if you are into X-Men, a cool super mutant 😉
But of course, don’t go overboard and get obsessed with it. Nothing is ever good in excess.
Being overly obsessed with this aspect of your social life may lead to social anxiety, which makes you worry about everything that you/others do. We don’t want that, obviously.
If you got issues with Social Anxiety, check out “My 7 Tips on how to cope with Social Anxiety“!
I look forward to hearing your stories on how you are going to use this newly acquired “Spider-Sense” 😉
Enjoyed the article?
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