Transition Anxiety (Got a new Goal?)

[Author’s note: Apologies to all comments I’ve received to date (30 Jan 2017) and have yet to respond to! I will get to them soon, I promise!]

Written By Benjamin Ngiam

I wrote this in the first week of January 2017 and it’s supposed to be a “New Year Post” but couldn’t get it up till now so here it is, now. Hey can’t blame me for my busy schedule, right?

Besides- it’s never to late to share insights with my fellow brothers and sisters! So let’s get right onto it! Today we will be talking about something which we can all relate to.

A new year will likely mean that you have a new goal / mission to attempt in life.

Perhaps you want to learn how to become a better conversationalist– Good for you!
You take action, talk to friends about it, watch videos and reading books. You feel super excited as you start learning all these new perspectives, ideas and theories on the topic which you’ve never known existed till the greater minds of the past shared their knowledge with you!

Things feel so positive that it seems like you are only a step closer to achieving your goal!

BUT, when it’s time to put things to the test and set out into the real world and apply what you’ve learned? You hesitate. And you resent yourself for it.

Don’t worry. We all go through this process. The process where we are afraid to take action because we do not want to screw things up and risk looking like an incompetent dumbass.

Through this fear, we trap ourselves in our current set of skills and “Level”.

What if you take the leap to try something, fall down and look like the dumbest crash test dummy?

You go through the state of Transition Anxietya state where you are vulnerable.

Think of a caterpillar spinning itself into a cocoon. It’s not going anywhere and is a perfect opportunity for a predator to come over and nab it for lunch.

Now, when the metamorphosis is finally complete and the newly reborn butterfly is crawling out for the first time? It is transitioning into its new life- this is where it is most vulnerable. It doesn’t have its cocoon’s protection anymore, nor has it master it’s new skill to survive.

Talk about easy dinner for predators!


So here’s the thing that most of us don’t realize- when you are going through something new, you will get a chance to go back to that innocent beginners perspective and see things with a new set of eyes.

Yes, you will feel vulnerable and definitely lots of anxiety because of that unpredictable and totally unknown possible outcome that’s “likely going to be negative” and you know what?

If you learn to embrace that feeling with a new perspective to things? You will benefit tremendously from it all. At any time when you find yourself given a chance to learn things from a beginners perspective?

Chances are, you are given the opportunity to evolve. Embrace it and level up. It’s a sign that you are on track and learning something new.

Talk to you again soon champs, hope you’re having a fantabulous new year. Till next time, stay chirpy.

Ciao! 😉

Your pal,
Benjamin

[Today’s Featured image is by Jefferson Clark]

23 thoughts on “Transition Anxiety (Got a new Goal?)

      1. Nice, hope you had a great time exploring, even though there isn’t really much here hah!

        Let me know when you’re gonna be visiting again yeah? Might be fun to hang out and all 😉

        Your pal,
        Benjamin

        Liked by 1 person

      2. There was a lot to see! Probably I felt that because it’s a new country. Haha yes! Actually Singapore is one of the country I will be applying for university after my 12th Grade. So probably if I get it we can meet haha. Its about 3-4years tho😛😂

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Both, but mainly studying at the moment. I resumed studying again about 4-6 months ago after working for a few years lol it’s good to be a student.

        So much lesser responsibility. Still, gotta be ready to take the responsibilities back when I go back to work though XD

        Btw, if you want, feel free to email me via doubleyourpresence@gmail.com
        or add me on friends via facebook if you want to continue a conversation which could be more personal.

        After all, the comments section is available for everyone to read lol!

        Either email or add me on facebook and we can converse even further. That is, if you are comfortable with it and want to lol! No obligation.

        Either way, let me know! We can always continue talking via wordpress if we’re not gonna be sharing too much personal info, so don’t fret too much on this.

        Your pal,
        Benjamin

        Liked by 1 person

  1. Wonderful words of advice, and I love the butterfly analogy! We definitely can learn a lot about ourselves by being more vulnerable and being willing to learn from our stumbles. It’s really the only way I truly learn so that it sticks with me; making mistakes/embarrassing myself. I try to remember that everyone has these experiences so I should be willing to embrace it, learn to laugh and be less critical of myself. Here’s to a new year of being more extroverted and embracing new people and conversations! It’s been rewarding so far and will hopefully lead to a brighter world for me and those I encounter! Have a wonderful day, ❤Anne

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Indeed! Thanks for sharing your thoughts here. Readers will definitely gain some insight from this comment too 😉

      Especially the fact that they aren’t alone and we’re all suffering the conversation issues hah!

      We are mostly unaware of it but a lot of us tend to be very critical and think very little of ourselves. It’s good to be humble but it’s NOT good to belittle yourself.

      Got to see the line lol! Good talk, great insights 😉

      You have yourself a beautiful day as well, Anne. Talk again!

      Your pal,
      Benjamin

      Liked by 1 person

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